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"Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking in anything." James 1:2-4

"Whatever you do in life, make sure you follow your heart. Nobody can see your vision like you can see it."

A personal blog, an unfiltered and uncensored place of expression, a personal journal.

EST 12/15/2009

Thursday, November 17, 2016

How To Strengthen Or Expose Your Friendships

I'm a big proponent on the fact that arguments can strengthen your friendship, but at the same time it can also expose your friendship for not being as strong as you thought it was. It's always weird when you have that first big argument with your friend because you don't really know how to deal with it or what to expect or do. I think I'll even dare to say that if you haven't had an argument with the people you call your best friends, I don't think y'all are really best friends. There's absolutely no way things can be all perfect, fine and dandy between 2 people, life and everyone's unique personality just won't allow it. If you've never argued with your best friends, there's a good chance y'all are probably hiding things or holding things in towards each other. I think about the BEST friends I have in my life...and I've had countless arguments with them, where we've said hella hurtful things towards one another, but it's only made our friendships stronger. Honesty goes a long way, and arguments bring out that honesty that we're sometimes afraid to show or express. Now on the flip side, I've had arguments with friends and it either became really weird after or we never really fixed it and simply don't talk anymore. In that context, arguments can expose weaknesses in your friendships or the fact that y'all weren't really as good of friends as you thought. It's an interesting concept you ponder. I think about like my true close friends who I trust my life with...the arguments we've had, the hurtful words we've said, even sometimes the amount of time we'd ignore each other for...all that made us better friends. Then I also think about the friends I thought would be ride or die, but then we'd argue...about some stupid things too...money, responsibilities, girls, life...and that kinda ends a friendship or takes it down a couple notches. Healthy arguments versus damaging ones I guess...but ultimately, I feel it's a good test of friendship, that'll strengthen it...or show you some things you need to work on if you choose to, you know. Cuz arguments force people to take initiative...sometimes, the other person messages you first and you're like wow, I appreciate it, just a week ago I messaged my friend cuz I overreacted to something and I was like yo I'm sorry, I appreciate all the times you've been there for me and he was like dang, thanks for saying that. But yeah, I was just recently inspired by the friend that I had the argument with and thought I'd write about it, till next time, peace.

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