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"Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking in anything." James 1:2-4

"Whatever you do in life, make sure you follow your heart. Nobody can see your vision like you can see it."

A personal blog, an unfiltered and uncensored place of expression, a personal journal.

EST 12/15/2009

Monday, January 16, 2017

Just Keep Swimming Part 2

Day 16/31

PART 1

So my entire day today was like messed...like my brain was like fried today. So I have this morning class from 10:30 to 12:30 and I had a quiz and the quiz is usually at the last hour/half hour of class, so I originally planned to catch the bus at 10:30 or 11 and be there just in time for class, but then I felt bad and was like whatever I'll just catch the bus at 10 and be like 10 minutes late for class. So this morning, my mom like woke me up abruptly and it like freaked me out cuz I think I was still in like deep sleep mode, so like my heart started racing and my brain like thought I was somewhat dremaing still, so I felt like that in itself messed up my whole day. So I went to check my phone to see what time it was, realized my phone hadn't been charging the whole time (the wire is messed). So had to charge my phone for as little as I could before leaving, found out it was 10, so had to catch the bus at 10:30 like I had first wanted to do. Lemme tell you my whole day felt like a ream...I was dozing off in all my classes, /I just kept replaying my mom like abruptly waking me up and part of me felt like I was still sleeping, so yeah my brain was just done today, I have my night class today but there's no way I'm going because there's no way I'm going to be able to stay awake.

Sometimes I feel like a lot of things I say get repetitive lol, of the themes and moods and talks that I have with you get stale sometimes...but they always hold true, because they\re always relevant. One being this idea of life being a race...and you gotta keep moving forward, how looking back slows you down. Life takes you through so many ups and downs, twists and turns that when you FINALLY get to a good place, when you're finally in a good situation...you just wanna sit still and embrace it and not change anything. It's like those old televisions with antennas, you move the antenna until you get it just right then you have to keep it there otherwise it'll mess up. I'm definitely like that, after so many ups and downs...when I finally am in a good position, I don't wanna move, it's comfortable, what if it doesn't get any better? But life goes on...with or without you, it's constantly changing and moving forward that if you don't change and adapt and move forward as well, you get left behind. Yeah it's dope when you come across good things and situations, be happy...embrace it at that moment, then move on and move forward. Just imagine yourself going on a road trip to Disney Land. If you stopped and rested a week at every dope scenery spot or tourist spot...you'd never get to Disney Land. In the same way, with life...if you keep stopping for long periods of time to admire what's around you, you'll never get to your final destination. I'm rereading that right now and man, it sounds dope...LOOOL, what I mean by that is like...it's really hitting me. Cuz a lot of times during road trips, the goal is to get to the final destination as fast as possible you know, to avoid detours and pit stops. But sometimes you can't help yourself...whether you gotta go to the washroom, you're hungry or you see something dope...you just wanna stop, but pit stops and detours are meant to be quick and fast...because it distracts from the main goal...and you wanna cut it to as little as possible because the whole point of the trip was the destination, not the pit stops right? So it's okay to stop and sit...and admire...but don't forget about the final destination, that's what you're here for.

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